


Not Gonna Leave You

by CastelloFlare



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Acceptance, Angst, F/M, Season 5 MSF, some zombie-killing action
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-05
Updated: 2014-12-05
Packaged: 2018-02-28 06:50:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2722784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CastelloFlare/pseuds/CastelloFlare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl had initially thought that the greatest distance was when they both lost each other. It was when it all happened before his eyes that he realized he was wrong.</p><p>The furthest they were from each other was when she was just right in front of him, and he couldn’t pull her back at the sound of the trigger.</p><p> </p><p>** Set a few days after S5 MSF</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Gonna Leave You

**Author's Note:**

> Even before she became a confidante and companion of Daryl, I have always been a fan of Beth Greene. I have inwardly rejoiced whenever I saw her onscreen; she was a character I could relate to in the sense that I know I would not survive very long in their lopsided world, but I want to choose to be brave, not only for me but for the people who are with me. I want to commend Beth Green for instilling in me that strength, and Emily Kinney, who has really given this role justice.
> 
> I'm hoping this will be the last angsty fic I write for Bethyl. Writing is the only way I could mourn Beth, and the only way I have the freedom to show that she meant something to Daryl. Even Emily and Norman were curious about how things would go between their characters, and as a fan I really felt shattered after the MSF. Beth, even without the promise of a romance with Daryl, is a character that I believe is someone who can do more for the show alive than dead. She deserves to be more than an attempt to increase the shock value of a mid-season finale.
> 
> I won't delay you any further with my rantings, we can talk about that in the comments below if you wanna. Bethyl on.

They were on a supply run when they encountered the walkers. Rick, Glenn, Maggie, Abraham, and Daryl, who very recently began jumping at every opportunity to kill something, left the rest of the group by the firetruck to look for some food and medical supplies. They had already cleared a nearly depleted convenience store and were on their way back with fully loaded bags when a horde of about twenty just came out of the trees and went straight for their group.

 

Daryl was the first to lay a headshot with his crossbow, and he was already walking towards the hissing lot of them while shooting his next target. He unsheathed his knife, and had killed his third when Abraham caught up to him using the butt of his heavy riffle and the others with their daggers.

 

Rick brought his gun out when more seemed to come out from the trees, and he yelled something about leaving the other walkers and running back, but all that carnage blocked Daryl’s senses and he pressed on, landing kill after kill with every step. A walker by his left took him by surprise and drove him to the ground; another two slipped and landed on him in a pile. They hissed and bared their teeth at him and he hissed back, and with his free hand he slammed his knife down on one of them. Two shots fired, and blood splattered onto Daryl’s grime-stained face.

 

“Daryl!” It was Glenn. The archer still lay there, panting and wiping at his eyes. Glenn lowered his gun and stalked towards him, talking like he was trying to stay calm and failing. “We could have run when they saw us. There was no need for you to start shooting and walking towards them. You didn’t have to put everyone in danger—!”

 

“That’s enough!” Abraham had grabbed him by the shoulder just as Rick grabbed both of Daryl’s arms when he was about to jump the Asian.

 

Rick repeated the former soldier’s words. “That’s enough. Both of you.”

 

Daryl was still breathing hard and trembling but he didn’t make any move to assault Glenn. Glenn nodded at Rick’s command but the mutual glare he shared with Daryl didn’t go away just yet. Abraham released his grip on his shoulder, and Daryl swung his arms to free himself from Rick. He made his way to retrieve the two bolts he had fired, and that was when they heard a single hissing sound from behind the trees.

 

Everyone fell silent. Only the sound of Maggie’s breath catching in her throat was heard when the walker, a hole buried in her stomach, trudged out from under the branches.

 

She looked young, like she was a teenager before she turned; her hair, which seemed to be fair under the dried blood and mud, was clumsily tied up behind her in a ponytail, with loose strands sticking out everywhere. She wore an olive green shirt, tattered where her guts hung out and waved about, jeans, and cowboy boots. She resembled someone who kept reappearing at the back of Daryl’s eyes, and he stood there, stunned in silence as the walker limped her way towards him.

 

The walker thrust out her hands as she got closer, but Daryl just stood there watching her, like he was actually waiting. With every step her hissing got angrier, hungrier, louder – and then there was a gunshot.

 

Daryl whirled around. Smoke was coming out from Abraham’s riffle.

 

His blood boiled within his veins and he saw red. Without a word, he stomped angrily towards him, slamming his boot over a fallen walker’s head in the process, but he didn’t stop. Not until he was held back by Rick and Glenn by both of his arms. With his movements restricted, he snarled at Abraham, who just glared back and made no move to further provoke him.

 

“Daryl, stop!” It was Rick and Glenn and Maggie but their voices sounded rather distant despite being close to his ears.

 

“We have to go,” Rick said when they heard walkers coming out from the other houses. They had attracted too much noise and the whole village seemed to come to life – except there was no more life there, only the risen dead. “We have to go, now.”

 

They picked up their bags and made haste and Daryl willed himself to not look back at the corpse of the girl that lay on the grass. 

 

They built a campfire by the firetruck and positioned themselves where they could feel the warmth of the fire and simultaneously be on the lookout, not just for walkers, but for people. They didn’t have the luxury of feeling safe, not even with their guns and ammo and the firetruck for escape.

 

Rick stared at the wings at Daryl’s back across the fire. There was clearly something wrong with him, which they decided not to address yet because it looked like the man himself didn’t want to talk about it. But as the leader, Rick looked out for his people, and for someone he cared for as his brother, he couldn’t just leave him like this. He excused himself from discussing the next step with Abraham, Rosita, Michonne, Tyreese and Glenn, and made his way towards Daryl.

 

“He didn’t know her, like we did,” He said, when he came close to the trees where Daryl was. “Didn’t actually get the chance.”

 

Daryl didn’t turn around, and kept staring forward and into nothing.

 

“He’s also looking out for you,” Rick went on when there was silence and no indication for him to stop. “Abraham’s new to us ‘xept Glenn, Maggie and Sasha, but what he did back there, he did it to get you back here. And Glenn, he’s also worried ‘bout you, but he knew we had to leave, and fast.”

 

“I know.” Daryl replied after another moment of silence. “’M… ‘m just not okay, Rick.”

 

“We know, Daryl. And we’re here if you need to talk t’ someone. You don’t have to go through this alone.” Rick put a hand on his shoulder, and Daryl finally looked at him. He went silent again, but he nodded, and Rick read that as his cue to give him some space and time to think.

 

Daryl went back to staring into the woods, his back to the fire and to his family who still felt worried about him. 

 

The fire still burned even as most of them fell asleep, either inside the back of the firetruck or in sleeping bags by the fire. Tara, Sasha, Tyreese and Maggie were on guard duty, and Daryl just lay awake in the same corner by the edge of the trees.

 

“Mind if I sit here?” Maggie said quietly when she came beside him, and sat down when she heard him grunt his reply. They just sat there for a moment, each to their own thoughts, but sharing a mutual feeling of comfort with the knowledge that Beth meant something for the other.

 

“Glenn feels bad, you know,” she said and smiled ruefully at nothing. “About sayin’ you put us all in danger just now. Says he shouldn’t have said that when you’re like this.”

 

“He was right, Mags,” Daryl said, his voice gruff from not speaking so much these past few days. “Ain’t been nothin’ but inviting trouble, I know. I didn’ plan on takin’ y’all with me. More like I haven’t really been plannin’ on anythin’.”

 

Maggie couldn’t hide the surprise in her face. Recently it was rare for Daryl to spit out two sentences that contained more than five words. Now he was going on like a shotgun.

 

“Abraham was right, too. I couldn’t do it, Mags. Couldn’t shoot her, that.” Daryl choked on saying ‘her’ and quickly corrected himself. Maggie realized he had something to say, and he could share it with her, the closest person remaining from the prison to Beth.

 

“You were with Bethy when we got out of the prison,” she said. It wasn’t a question, but Daryl nodded. “Was it just you and my sister?”

 

“Didn’t see anyone else,” Daryl cast his eyes upon the ground. He wiped on his nose with the back of his hand, but it wasn’t because of the cold. “Thought all of you was dead. Didn’t care much about anythin’ else but she pulled me back.”

 

Maggie’s eyes began to tear up. “Sounds like my Bethy.” She wiped at her tears with her sleeve and blinked away the ones threatening to fall out. “I have to thank you. For stayin’ with her after the prison. For savin’ her. You kept her alive.”

 

Daryl looked at her. “No, Mags. She did all that. She saved me. She kept me alive.”

 

And Maggie broke into tears. Her hand flew up to her mouth and she tried to keep from sobbing. Her body shook and her heart ran fast as did her lungs. It felt bittersweet hearing someone else talk about Beth like this after days of silence and grief, after the Governor and when they lost the prison – she had never thought that the last day she saw her sister alive was when they both watched their father die. And she didn’t really have the chance to mourn.

 

Daryl placed an awkward hand over her back until she calmed down, and her breathing went back to normal.

 

“Beth would laugh and say I’m ugly for cryin’,” Maggie shook her head and smiled through her tears. “Then I’d just laugh with her like nothin’s wrong…”

 

She swallowed and composed herself, wiping at the last of the tears that smeared her face. Daryl could hear her crying at night ever since they came from Grady, but come morning and Maggie goes back to being another survivor in the group, dealing with the dead and caring for their family. She was strong, and he knows because strength and courage ran in the Greenes.

 

“Got somethin’ for you,” Maggie said as she took something out of her pocket. It was a piece of paper, torn from a notebook and neatly folded into a small rectangle. “Found this in her jeans pocket but I never really took a look ‘til this afternoon.”

 

Daryl took it, and by the light of the fire, he looked at both sides. When he saw no name or anything, he asked, “You sure this is not for you?”

 

“Don’t think Bethy thought she was gonna go that day,” Maggie said quietly. “I think she wrote that for the last person she was with before she was taken into Grady.”

 

Daryl only stared at the piece of folded paper in his hands, not sure if he wanted to open it. 

 

“Whatever you shared with Beth, you don’t have to tell us. I won’t ask you, and you don’t need to name it.”

 

Maggie slowly stood up, patted his shoulder twice, and went back to resume her post. In the silence and in his isolation, Daryl thought of whatever was in the paper. He knew Beth used to write in her diary, but she had long since stopped doing that when they were on the road together. What could she have written? Was she disappointed in him, thought he let her down?

 

Whatever she wrote, he knew with a heavy heart that he couldn’t face her anymore and ask her about it, so he decided to be brave and unfolded the paper.

 

It was a poem. And it was her writing.

 

Drink with me, rekindled spirit  
A toast to believing in a new tomorrow  
Relish in a moment this fire has lit  
You won’t remember sadness nor sorrow  
Let me pour you a glass of moonshine  
Dance with me on your twinkle toes  
Ignite the fire and we will dine  
Xoxos when nobody knows  
Once we’re apart, always remember  
Never gonna leave you, I won’t, never.

 

Daryl’s vision was clouded with tears which fell onto the paper, smearing the ink. He didn’t need to look twice. It was his name.

 

He had thought that the greatest distance was when they both lost each other. It was when it all happened before his eyes that he realized he was wrong. The furthest they were from each other was when she was just right in front of him, and he couldn’t pull her back at the sound of the trigger. Now, she was neither near nor far; he carried memories and pieces of her wherever he went.

 

And sat there with his tears, with a voice ringing in his ears like a symphony, saying…

 

“I’m not gonna leave you.”

**Author's Note:**

> The poem is open to any interpretation.
> 
> Thank you for reading this, love.


End file.
